Searching for a therapist that aligns with you is incredibly hard. It is such an important and vulnerable making relationship, so it needs to be right for you.
If you have ADHD or are autistic, it is even more vital that your therapist is informed and aware of what you might be challenged with.
This enables your therapist to be super understanding from enquiry, through to actual therapy and make accomodations for you if needed.
The therapist needs to be able to help you understand your processing through a filter of Neurodiversity, this takes experience, compassion and knowledge.
Many therapists claim expertise here, so do ask them what that is and where it was achieved.
It doesn’t always have to be specialist training, though this helps.
I find that the most important thing is a passion and drive to work with my neurodiverse clients, to support them in any way I can. I am curious and interested in the way my clients see the world in their unique way.
This means that discussions revolve not around deficit but around inclusion and understanding my clients unique processing, not a list of traits.
A client recently said he felt like a ladybird 🐞 without spots; different and alone. We carefully worked this through, his experience is valid and I did not minimise it. When I found this beautiful ladybird without spots, I sent it to him immediately!
My experience as a therapist is a combination of up to date training, working with a myriad of clients who identify as Neurodiverse and a passion to support my clients.
I never claim I am an expert, no one is an expert on any other human being!
You may also want to know if the therapist identifies themselves as Neurodiverse and this is a totally valid question and one I welcome.
I don’t identify as Neurodiverse myself and always fully understand if a client does not want to work with me because of it, it’s totally fine I really understand.
Saying that, it’s so important to remember it’s the person who matters not their Neuro type. If you don’t gel it’s fine, find someone else who you do resonate with and let that be ok.
Rejection sensitive dysmorphia (RSD), can get in the mix here, so be patient with yourself. A good therapist will explain that they fully understand if you don’t choose them to work with.
Ask as many questions as you need and do try to speak to as many therapists as you are able to. Having a written script is fine and do give it to the therapist if you want to beforehand.
Trying a session to see if the therapist and their space works for you, can be ideal. I am always happy to do this or show the space to make sure my clients are comfortable.
Let them know the best way for you to communicate, they should adjust to support you and what you need.
If they won’t then they might not be right for you. An example is frequency of sessions, some people find weekly too much, I understand this and try to work with that.
Therapy can be such a great experience but it needs to be with the right person who encourages and sees your qualities, as well as challenges, we all deserve that! ❤️